Heta Beta
by IndieVal01
Summary: Marzia goes to Berlin, Germany, to test the beta of a new game, "Axis of Evil", where nothing is known about the game other than; it starts at the history of wars and ends at WWII, and that the goal is to "end the war". Taking it as a chance of a lifetime, she goes. Maybe she should've stayed home. (T to be safe; Noytalia, 2p!Talia, regular-Hetalia, PDP, Tobuscus, Cry, Nova)
1. Prologue of Evil

***Here is some cracktasticness, featuring my favorite characters and favorite people. DO NOT HATE ME! THIS WAS A WEIRD DREAM I HAD A COUPLE NIGHTS AGO!***

Saturday, my parents recieved THIS letter;

"_**HELLO, PROUD PARENTS OF MARZIA LOUBERG; YOUR SON HAS BEEN SELECTED TO TRY THE BETA VERSION OF**___AXIS OF EVIL_**, **__**A HISTORY-BASED VIDEO GAME THAT STARTS EARLY ON IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD AND ENDS AT THE SECOND WORLD WAR! THE GAME CONSISTS OF ONE OBJECTIVE; END THE WAR. THE GAME IS ABSOLUTELY FREE, AND THE FLIGHT TO BERLIN, GERMANY, IS PAID FOR IN FULL, AS IS HOUSING! MARZIA LOUBERG IS ALLOWED TO BRING AT MOST TWO PEOPLE OF HER CHOICE TO ACCOMPANY HER TO BERLIN AND STAY WITH HER UNTIL SHE COMPLETES THE GAME. WE HOPE THAT YOU WILL ACCEPT THE RARE OFFER OF A LIFETIME. IF YOU DO, THEN SIGN THE SHEET THAT FOLLOWS**_."

After much begging and pleading, my parents let me go. Because both of my parents are disabled and cannot speak a single ounce of German, they allowed me to have my cousin, Mikhael, join me and meet my sister, Stephanie, in Berlin. She moved there shortly after college, even though she is only twenty-two and Mikhael is only twenty-one. He's toured Germany with his band (he even opened for Rammstein once; be jealous, fishes!) and is fluent in German, as well is Stephanie.

Mikhael and I boarded the plane to Germany, after much heartfelt goodbyes and everything, and we flew an eight-hour-freaking-flight to get to Berlin.

Eight hours. You would think that with the great technological advances within the last fifty years, we would be able to speed up a plane ride.

When we got there, Stephanie picked us up and we headed to her house before heading to "_Gerade Aus_", which I believe means "Straight Ahead". Like "Straight ahead" to the future. Got it?

Did you know that Slenderman was German? Yeah, Der Grossmann, Der Ritter, Slendy; all German. The Germans started both world wars, which is sad. A game, "Mad Father", took place in Germany. And the fact that I came to Germany to test the "_Krieg Beta_" just confirms that everything scary and evil starts in Germany.

Well, Russia, as well, but in Germany, it's more common. As I was saying; everything scary is made in Germany.

Just saying.

***Sorry for crappy story, this is like the prologue, and well, you can see what's going on if you wanna keep reading.***


	2. Da Gaymahs!

Stephanie drops me off at "_Gerada Aus_". Standing outside of the front door are three body guards, wearing jet-black uniforms with thick bullet-proof vests, large helmets, holding large rifles in their hands, black pants tucked into their thick black leather boots, loads of ammunition strapped to their bodies, more weapons on their belts, and hard-to-see-features. They are ABSOLUTELY HUGE, TALL, and well-built. Two have pale golden hair, one seeming to be very long. Another has almost white hair, short and messy. I can't see their faces, but they appear to be clean-shaven.

I glance back at Stephanie, who will stay parked until I enter the building. I then approach the guards, backpack slung over my right shoulder. I say as clearly as I can in German, "_Hello, I'm Marzia Louberg. I'm a tester._"

One of them, the short-gold-haired one, says in German, _"Sehr gut. Do you have the paper?_"

Actually, I clutch it to my chest, afraid of losing it. I hold it out, and he takes it from me. He inspects it. It is the return-paper that I had to bring to be able to be a tester. He seems satisfied, handing it to me, and says, "_We hope you will enjoy the game._"

They open the door, and the white-haired one says, "_Go straight down the hall, and you'll find a fellow tester down there. A game designer would meet you, but our top designers have been editing the game. After all, it is only a work-in-progress._"

"_Vielen Dank,_" I say and walk past them. I walk down the hall, not looking at anything for fear of an evil ghost attacking me-I played a game once where I was told, "Don't look back" and when I looked back, a ghost killed me and I had to start over from the beginning.

In all honesty, I don't know anything about this game. It is incomplete, it is about war, I have to end the wars, but...that's all. I don't know about the setting, if I stop the war from happening or ending or change who won or whose side I'm on in what war or if I can die or...I just don't know.

At the end of the hall, I see a familiar face. For a moment, I think that it is the dim lighting, but as I get closer, I recognize the writing on the shirt that looks like aged stone. I gasp, asking breathlessly, "Tobuscus?"

The guy smiles at me and says, "Ahahah, no, I'm Steven."

"YOU ARE TOBUSCUS!" I exclaim, clasping my hands together by my heart in admiration, "I was told that there would be other testers, but Tobuscus? Is UberHaxorNova here?"

"Totally, man," Toby says.

"Is PewDiePie here?"

"Poo-hoo?"

Heart breaking, I start to hang my head, and he says, "Haha, sorry, man! I didn't mean it! He's here, come on, follow me to the Online Room."

My heart warms up again. PEWDIEPIE IS HERE! I follow Tobuscus, feeling my insides tickle all over. Man, I'm a fourteen-year-old-girl surrounded by my adult YoutTube crushes, and we're all paid to play video games! This is a dream come true!

I follow him into a large, nearly empty room. The room only has a single, large thing in the middle, which appears to be lumpy; it is covered by a black tarp which is connected to some pullies on the ceiling.

To the left of the room is a steep metal staircase that I follow Toby up. He talks to me cheerily, saying, "Soo, you're the new YouTuber chosen? Totally cool-I guess that you're a part of the Braudience?"

"Totally," I say breathlessly, staring into space, thoughts wandering. Toby, Pewds, and Nova! Could Cry be here?

A voice I recognize as the Faceless One comes from the top of the stairs, saying, "Hey, it's the new tester, guys~!"

His voice is so adorable, calm, serene, welcoming, lovable...I lift my head up to see him, and the guy wears a funny bunny-rabbit mask with eye holes showing blue eyes. I gasp, saying, "Cry?! You-you-you!" I have now lost my breath, feeling like those nerdy girls that have crushes over anime characters and get excited when they see cosplayers.

**(Author's note; I just insulted myself there ;_;")**

The guy takes off the bunny mask, now wearing a circular, white mask with a "pokerface" look on it, and he asks, "How'd you know?"

"Your voice!" I exclaim, finding breath again. "Awahah~hahah~aww" the inhuman sound comes endlessly from my voice. I'm sure that both Cry and Toby know that I must have a crush on them-wait, I do not! Do I? Crushes are for dummies! I want to get a career and a life before I get a crush! So many men and women have terrible financial problems because they moved out with their crushes after highschool and avoided getting real lives outside of _The Notebook_ and _Titanic_!

At the top of the stairs, I see two more guys coming from around the bend out of another room. I see a Hispanic-looking man with a very pretty face and a blonde guy wearing a striped shirt with wavy blonde hair.

My eyes widen, and I am breathless again. Tobuscus says, "Guys, this is the new tester!"

The guys all hold out their hands to shake my hand, which I force myself to do. PewDiePie seems so adorkable and shy, and when I clasp his hand, I feel that it is a little clammy. He's always a little shy in his Vlogs and such, and he claims to not deserve his fanbase, and he is, after all, Swedish, so he's so shy! That's adorable!

"I'm PewDiePie," PewDiePie says. I like that they're refering to themselves by their user names!

"I'm Nova."

"I'm Cry."

"I'm Tobuscus."

I introduce myself to all of them one by one by my user name, "I'm LewezBurger."

Maybe I would've introduced myself as Marzia Louberg, but PewDiePie's girlfriend is Marzia, so that would've been confusing. In fact, within moments, Marzia (CutiePie) comes walking out of the same room that they came from, looking even prettier than she usually does in the videos, and she says in her high-pitched, adorable squirrel voice, "It's the new tester! Hello," we shake hands, and she says, "I'm CutiePieMarzia" and I say, "I'm LewezBurgerMarzia..."

Everyone takes a laugh and Tobuscus says, "How ironic, we've got two Marzias!"

Cry says in his calm voice, "We're twice as blessed~."

After jokes go around concerning our names, they all show me to the Online Room, which is, what Tobuscus said, where they test the online-download version of the game.

"So," I ask shakily, trying to sound clear and composed, "How is the game, 'Axis of Evil'? I don't really know much about it..."

"We don't, either," Cry says. Nova informs me, "It's random clips they make us test out online, and it's not even like part of the game; we like go through trees and things like that."

"Oh," I say in such a soft voice that even I can't here myself.

Cutie tells me, "Dey have...beeg masheen" she points over her shoulder, "um, down sair...where we weel all test" she holds her hands on either side of her face like the five-dollar-foot-long-commercials, "beeg versin of game, where we wear goggles and, um..." she looks at Pewds and asks, "Can you explain, please?"

"Sure," he says, turning to me, and says, "It is a big machine you stand in and it is like you are in the game, and you walk around in it and grab things and stuff, like in real life. They make us design characters before getting in there, though."

Nodding, I say, "Wow, that sounds really cool! Like Kinect?"

Cutie and Pewdie nod, and I say with a giggle, "I watched your videos where you played Kinect...it was so funny!"

The Italian and the Swede smile, looking at each other with a look of "wow" and PewDiePie asks sheepishly, "I hope that my stuff isn't too..." he scrunches his shoulders up, looking at me with a "forgive me" look as he says, "Innapropriate?'

"It's okay," I say, smiling, imaging all the funny jokes he made that should have been censored from the whole universe. "Really, there is a WHOLE lot worse, and you're really funny!"

"Thanks," Pewds says. We enter the Online Room where they show me the computers, machines, coffee machine-I deny because I'm LDS, which none of them know *teardrop* so I just explain that we don't drink coffee or tea. Well, I explain, we drink herbal tea.

Basically, all we do today in the Online Room is literally just update our YouTube pages and test the graphics and audio on the online version of AOE, or "BetaKrieg" or "Krieg Beta". I like "BetaKrieg" and "AOE".

Seven-thirty comes by relatively quickly because time flies when you're having fun with your role models, and I have to go downstairs to wait for Stephanie's car. I can't wait to tell her about PewDiePie and CutiePie and Tobuscus and Cry and Nova!

She never understood my love for video games or gamers, but she likes listening to me. I climb in the car, pouring my heart our as we drive back to her house.


	3. Da Dome of Evil!

I am on YouTube, like a beast, watching some "funny moments" montages from Pewds and Toby. I see that I have a message in my inbox, so I go up and click.

Ya know, cuz I love talking to my fans.

Message from; "CheezBaggaLayday". She's my BFFL! (Heck no, that's very stereotypical teenager right there; we're sisters!) We go to school together and check out each other's YouTube channels!

It reads; "OHMAGOSH" as the title. I click on it, and here it is;

AJHJJGASDGAASDKJHGSSDFGHJKJH GFDSASDFGHJK DSBDanmsa sAUB ldAnlewx uygxw eguz u wuycdwgbABahbsadgkdsjhdsjgfg HAHFAJJGSFGFQW

YOU MET PEWDIEPIE AND TOBUSCUS?! HOW?! YOU'RE IN BERLIN! WHAT THE! HOW! MARTZY, HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?! D: I WAS JUST CHECKING OUT TOBY'S CHANNEL, AND I SAW HIM SUGGESTING SOMEONE ON AN ANNOTATION ON ONE OF HIS MINECRAFT VIDEOS WHERE HE SAID, "oh, hey, i'm in germany, minecraft is german, lololololol by the way click the annotation above to see my awesome new buddy in berlin" AND I IGNORED IT AND THEN WENT TO PEWDIE'S CHANNEL TO CHECK FOR FRIDAY'S WITH PEWDIEPIE AND IN THAT VIDEO HE SAID THAT HE'S IN BERLIN WITH CRY, TOBUSCUS, NOVA, AND I WAS SO EXCITED, THEN HE SAID "LewezBurger" AND DSHIISIFDHAISDFGHJKASDFGHJKK JHGFKJHGFDSSSDFGHJHG YOU MET MY IDOLS?! YOU'RE IN GERMANY? SINCE WHEN? COME ON, I DON'T GET IT! YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT A VAY-CAY BEFORE SPRING BREAK! AND A VAY-CAY WITH PEWDS AND TOBES?!

So I reply with; Well, just a couple days ago I got a letter saying that I could fly to Berlin to test a beta of a game called "AXIS OF EVIL" WHOOOOO AND I JUST FOUND OUT EARLIER TODAY THAT MY FELLOW TESTERS ARE PDP, TOBY, NOVA, AND CRY! ISN'T IT AWESOME?! MARZIA'S ALSO HERE!"

She replied with LIKE CUTIEPIEMARZIA

And I replied with TOTALLY CUTIEPIEMARZIA

I made a Vlog and uploaded it, me saying, "Guys what, Burger Buddies? I am TOTALLY in Berlin, Germany—GERMANY!—with PewDiePie, Tobuscus, UberHaxorNova, and ChaoticMonki-aka-Cry! I've been invited to Berlin to test a beta of a new game, and turns out, my favorite gamers are here as well! CutiePie is also here—so I am so happy!"

Rambling on as I usually do, I then end the Vlog and edit it then upload it. I have thirty watchers, and a lot of them are all like, "THAT'S AWESOME I SAW THAT ON TOBY'S CHANNEL I GOTTA CHECK OUT THOSE OTHER GUYS NOW!"

Turns out, I have a thousand new subscribers thanks to the famous YouTubers sending them my way! Yes! Now I'm sending people to Cry, Nova, and Pewds as well! They need more luff, too!

**(PEWDS' VIEW, PEEPS. PREPARE FOR AWESOMENESS THAT RIVALS ONLY TOBUSCUS AND PRUSSIA. ALSO, I DON'T KNOW IF HE ACTUALLY HAS FIKAS, BUT SINCE HE'S SWEDISH, IT WOULD MAKE SENSE.)**

Okay, I have a really crazy day—if any of you have seen my Vlogs, then you know how it goes. I wake up, film myself for several games, edit them, upload them, spend time with Marzia, get fan mail and save it up for Friday…Marzia and I have fika breaks, though. It's a coffee break, and even though I love talking, I like nice peace and quiet during my fika break.

Right now, Marzia and I are fika'ing in silence. She drinks hot cocoa and I drink hot cocoa. We both snack on Swedish candies that are like marshmallows, but are a hundred times better. We finish, and Marzia asks me in her tentative voice, "Do you want to be going outside to see Berlin for Vlog?"

"Sure," I say. Within moments, we are out in the Berlin streets, and neither of us speak German. Lol, jk, I'm awesome at speaking German! "HE*insertplem*INZ VI*insertphlem*CE HURK DEWTS*insterphlem*HLOND!"

Okay, I don't speak German, but we're bound to know how to stay out of the need to…how am I trying to word this? I sound dumb; we shouldn't need to speak to Nazis!

Okay, don't hate me for that, I'm not trying to be hateful, I love Germans, their beer is awesome and their girls have nice butts.

**(Just saying, if you actually watch PDP, he would totally make that comment because he has no boundaries on his luls, which normally consist of saying someone has nice butts; even the Grunt from Amnesia is hot according to him)**

Although their women could probably kill me with just looks. I'M SCARED! MARZIA, HOLD ME!

I hold my camera in front of me, Vlogging, saying, "It amazes me, um, I just found five Bros here…um, we're not in Mexico, so we're not Brochachos here…Marzia, what's 'bro' in German?"

Marzia is in the spotlight, eyes wide, and she says sheepishly, "Ai doo not know…"

"Okay!" I say to the camera, "I met, um…isn't 'brother' 'bruder' in German? I MET FIVE BRUS! BROOS! BREWS! GET IT, BREWS, LIKE BEER? YA GET IT, RIGHT, BREWS? Sorry, I'm weird."

Getting back to our apartment—paid for by "Yeroduh Awz" **(readers, he might hear "****_Gerade Aus_****" and translate it into his Swedish accent, which is what he'll call it)**—and I edit the vid and upload it.

**(OKAY, NOW FOR TOBY'S VIEW, PREPARE FOR SOME AWESOMENESS THAT ONLY RIVALS PRUSSIA!)**

I end one of my Happy Wheels videos, ending with, "If you sneezed during this video, bless you; peace out!" and begin to edit the video.

Coming to Berlin is awesome! I've been the Hamburg before, and Germany is just awesome! Now I get to test a game; cool! I wish I had more info on the game, though. I mean, okay, it must be history based and violent, but for the last week that we've been here, we've only tested the graphics and audio, really. Now, if they wanted an anger reaction, have me play it; if they want a terror reaction, have PewDiePie play it; if they want a "lol guys u so weird" reaction, have Cutie play it—seriously, did you see her play Slender with Pewds? He was crying while she was just laughing. She also did that while they played Amnesia; she purposely ran toward the monsters to make Pewdie cry.

Get it? Pewdie CRY. Like their co-ops, PewDieCry?

Like Cry, aka ChaoticMonki? Okay, okay, I get it. STEVEN, SCREEN SHOT THIS AWKWARD MOMENT TO BE FOREVER REMEMBERED.

Oh yeah. I left him in America. *teardrop*

Well, I'm a walking distance away from Gerade Aus, so I leave my apartment and head there. Usually I'm first, but sometimes Nova beats me.

Now, wondering why we refer to ourselves by usernames? Hahaha, cuz we're awesome like that.

I get there, passing by the guards and down the hallway, into the room, up the stairs, down the next hallway, and into the Online Room. LewezBurger is already here, and I gasp, saying, "Whoa, bro!" I laugh, "You're early!"

She looks up at me, eyes wide, and asks, "I didn't do somethin' wrong, did I?"

"No," I say, "just I'm normally the first, or Nova beats me."

With a sigh, she says, "Phew, I was afraid that I did something wrong…How're you?"

"Good," I say as I log onto my computer. I glance at her, laughing, "You're at Pewds's comp!"

Lewez looks at her keyboard, then says, "Oh, that makes sense."

"Why?"

"I thought that I could smell crack on the home keys…"

Needless to say, that chick is gonna get along well with us!

**(LewezMarzia's POV)**

Four days go by in GERMANY, WHOOOOOOOOO and guess what? I have a million followers on YouTube now! It's crazy! Like, how?!

Well, I go to the Online Room as normal and get on my computer. I start testing the day's graphics, seeing how well the system works under rapid clicking, commands, running fast, walking slow, shaking mouse, slamming keyboards, and everything. I run many programs in the background, which normally stresses online or downloaded games and programs. Well, the programs mess up, but the game runs perfectly!

I test arrows in the game, guns, loading, unloaded, weapons-exchange, putting on armor—it's so lifelike! Like you can't push a button; you load bit by bit, change weapon bit by bit, mess with your protection like you would in real life—it's so complex and real!

The three guards that are usually outside weren't outside this morning, which was weird. Nothing was different inside, though. It started storming outside, though, within minutes of my entrance, so I was tentative to start the computers, but they had ensured me that they were built to withstand hurricane-weather.

While I reload my bow, struggling to pull back the bow string, the long-blonde-haired guard enters the Online Room, holding his gun as usual, and speaks for the first time I've heard, saying in a gruff voice, "_The Stand-In machine is ready for testing. You will be mainly creating your character today, testing the surroundings, actions and such—the game won't let you progress past today's required point._"

"_Thank you_," I say. He continues, saying, "_Feel free to take your pack, but you can't have communication devices or laptops in there in the machine—those things can tamper with the Core Drive._"

Because he said that, I agree and put my phone, my laptop, walkie-talkie, and pager in there. I keep a package of crackers, a bottle of water, a small first aid kit, and my calculator in there.

I love that calculator. I named him Rob. Don't judge. He supplies free Wi-Fi.

Following the guard down the hallway then down the stairs, my backpack over my right shoulder, I feel giddy and childish. Yes, I am a child, but strangely enough, a lot of adults call me mature. I know a lot and can engage in their discussions, but I'm more like an intelligent immature adult than a mature young woman.

The tarp is off of the machine, the Core Drive—right, didn't he call it that?—and I see how monumental it is. It is a see-through dome—not perfectly round; it is pieced together out of triangles, pentagons, and hexagons—with only a single elevated touch-screen on the far end of the dome. The dome is about as big as an elementary school classroom, and the touch-screen is like the marker board.

I am held in awe of this, and the guard tells me, "_Only the guards and I have fingerprints imbedded in the system to lock and unlock the doors. Now, in there, the floor will have black tiles forming a square; there will obviously be empty space where you can put your pack and such between game plays. Anything outside of the square cannot be accessed during the game, as is the point. Now, just follow instructions on the pad to access the game and to end game play to eat or drink or just rest. Whatever you fancy. I will be outside the Dome, ready to open the door if you knock._ _You cannot have your pack on the square. Do not damage the system._"

I thank him and enter the door as it opens. The man says one last thing before the door closes; "_Do _not_ damage the system_."

The door closes, and I am alone in the Dome. It is not see-through on this side. It is just a bunch of mirrors. I look all around me at my reflections, feeling sick to my stomach and dizzy from my face so many times—YES, I'M THAT UGLY! WAHHH!—and I decide to start the game. I place my pack outside the square, its arm strap sagging onto the square a bit, though.

Like a boss, I tap the monitor. In English, it has written down instructions. It says to select the third tab that says "IDENTITY". I select "IDENTITY" and come to a large screen that spills out from the floor to the ceiling, everything now black and surreal around me. This is where I design my character!

I select brown-black hair that goes to my thighs—which my hair is close to doing—and is swept off of my right shoulder and over my left shoulder, some of it inside a caramel-brown leather jacket, some of it outside to be noticed. I wear black, many-pocketed military-style pants that are tucked into brown leather boots. Under the brown leather jacket, collar raised, is a tight black shirt.

The game style is similar to 3D anime or something! It looks so cool! I select a thick "double belt" as it is labeled, which is two large belts on me at once, forming an X. The belt has holsters for pistols, knives, swords, bottles, and anything else that would fit.

Why did I select this get-up? Well, simply because it has high defense rating, high intimidation rating, and I look like a beast. I zoom in on my face and start to edit it. I give myself semi-tan skin, like I have, I give her brown-yellow eyes, black-rimmed, strict, yet kind eye-design, a small, triangular face, semi-thick eyebrows, semi-broad build, and (lol don't hate me) semi-big breasts.

What? They're only B's.

I name her "Minerva Mars" like the Roman goddess of wisdom and the Roman god of war.

Don't hate me, people call me that in school.

I click "submit" and I am launched into the game. A large buffering-circle appears, and I laugh, saying, "They see me rollin', zey hatin'~"

Halfway through the load, lightning crackles outside, hitting the roof of the building, and the loading screen disappears, and everything turns black.

_***UPLOADING THIS HALFWAY THROUGH BECAUSE MOM IS YELLING AT ME FOR NOT BEING IN BED, HOPE YA LIKE!***_


	4. Da Greeks of Evil!

***Okay, here it is! The Hetalia part is coming up! :D BE EXCITED!***

I gasp, frozen in place. I am entirely still, almost sure that my heart has stopped. Everything is jet black. You know how you can sometimes see your nose? I can't see my nose.

Standing still for what seems like hours—although probably only a minute or so—I find breath. Suddenly, lights flash on, and I am standing in woods.

There is a crackling sound ringing all around me, like the sound when Slenderman is about to get you, which gets louder, more painful, the surrounding trees, grass, rocks, sky, and everything becoming distorted and wobbly and discolored, then the sound fades away, and everything looks beautiful, serene, and peaceful.

Below my feet, the grass looks so real. It bends under my feet, and I kneel down to stroke the grass. Not only does it feel real and semi-prickly like real grass, it feels uneven and smells like grass! Smell! I feel slight wind tug at my clothes, and then I notice that my hand is somewhat darker than normal, and my shirt sleeve is brown and leather.

I gasp, jumping to my feet, and I look at my hands. I wear the leather jacket! Even on my elbows, there are the dorky brown patches that I had customized the jacket to have! I look down at my torso, and I see the belt and the pants and the boots!

The "system crash" must've been part of the game! I am relieved. I don't know how to move—perhaps I use my hand, like in Kinect?—because there are no in-game instructions. I take a step forward, and I move in the surroundings. It's like I'm really here!

Excited, I run over to a tree. I see little ants crawling up and down the imperfect bark. It smells like bark! I see some sap leaking out of a wound in the tree, and I pick at it. It is sticky and gooey like real sap! When I sniff it, it smells real!

German engineering.

How far can I go in the game before running into the wall or something? Putting that to the test, I begin to jog away, through the trees. I step on a rock, AND HOLY CRAP, IT HURTS LIKE BEING RUN OVER BY RANDOM BIKE! –did ya get the Nova joke there?

I inspect the rock. Not only did it hurt and my toe still throbs in pain, it doesn't look like a dumb gray lump! It is is kind of peach colored with other tiny rocks in it! What did we call that in science class? Where molten rock has more rocks in it while it cools down to form a solid?

Meh, who cares? I'M IN A GERMAN GAME!

Wait, my pack! I want to go see if I can find it! I run back to home base, grabbing the rock and carrying it with me—I'm naming it…Rocco—and see the small clearing that I had been in. I see a slight black object protruding out of nowhere, and when I kneel by it, it is my pack's strap. I gently grab it and tug on it. My bag comes right out of the ground and onto the grass with a soft _thumpf_!

AMAZING! I open the pack, and there is my bottle of water, my snacks, Rob, and now I place Rocco in there! I throw the pack over my shoulder and begin to march away in the direction where I was originally heading. I find the divot where Rocco had been, and I continue marching in that direction. I can smell every aspect of the woods, the plants, the fresh air, and I can even smell the peace. I see an animal trail and begin to follow it. Man, this is so awesome! There aren't much woods like this in Arkansas!

Wait, "there ain't much woods like this," "there isn't much woods like this" or what? AH, WHO CARES?! THIS GAME ROCKS!

I start to sing, in love with the serenity of this place. "All I know is that to me you look like you're having fun, open up your loving arms watch out here I come...you spin me right round baby right round like a record baby right round round round..."

Yes, I'm singing the song "You Spin me Round" by Dead or Alive. Not the dumb Flo Rida cover. Heck no.

The song doesn't really suit the mood, but it's either that or "Safe and Sound" by Taylor Swift and that song is kinda a bumber because it's sad...

Well, I start to sing "Thousand Years" by Christina Perri. I lurf that song to death. That, and "You will be Mine" by Lenka.

"I see you sitting there at your window sill, looking for shooting stars...I wanna get closer and closer still; I want to take over your heart...You will be mine, mine...Over time, time...You're gonna find, find...I'll make you mine, mine..."

I lurf that song even more.

A several rounds of the song go by when I smell something burning. I hurry toward the smell, bracing myself for some sort of fight—after all, this _is_ a war game, if I'm correct. Once there, I see the burning ruins of a city based on a coast. The city appears to have been beautiful—I imagine white pillars everywhere, red roofs, large ships filling the docks, people mingling in the streets—and it reminds me of what we learned in Social Studies about Ancient Greece…

Ancient Greece?

Hurrying down the mountain, I race toward the city. The soil here isn't very good for farming, and seeing the ruins of this burning city, I realize that this must be Athens when the Persians burned it. Right?

I get there and find everyone in the city dead. I place my hand over my mouth, surprised at the carnage and the smell. It is so realistic…the heat from the fires and burning ruins rise into the air, baking me from all sides. I move delicately through the city, calling out, "Hello? _Hello_?! Any survivors?"

This is Ancient Athens—they can't understand English! But just hearing a voice would be welcoming, right?

A little further ahead, I see a body of a slim male with chin-length brown hair, wearing an Athenian military uniform, hands curled up into slight fists by his chest, head bowed, like when you hold something precious. I get closer, feeling my heart splitting in two. As I get closer, a screen, like a square thought bubble, appears above the body, saying; _"_**ANCIENT ATHENS**_; Burned by the Persians, _**Sparta**_ gathered surviving Athenians and continued the war against _**Persia**_._"

That doesn't sound right! I could've sworn that in history class, we said that Athens' navy was still able to fight, right…right?

Behind me, I hear a sharp, deep-voiced bark, snapping, "PERSIAN, TURN AND FIGHT!"

I wheel around, surprised, and see a Greek warrior holding a large shield with a Spartan "V" on it, holding a long spear in the right hand. I gasp, eyes widening, and I back up, saying, "I'm not Persian!"

"You are obviously not _Greek_!" the man says. He had darker skin, black hair like the other man's—but it is longer, to his shoulders—and he has a thin beard. He is well-built, more masculine and somewhat shorter than the possibly-dead-Athenian, so the Spartan is built like a wrestler. He wears the Greek uniform, red like Sparta's, with a helmet and a red horse-mane plume.

Gulping, I say, "I'm not Persian or Greek! I—I—"

He charges me with his spear pointed down. I hold my hands over my face, waiting to be speared, but the scene freezes, and a bubble appears above him, saying "**SPARTA**;_ known for military strength, stamina, and tactics. While _**Athens**_ had the navy, _**Sparta**_ had the foot soldiers. Together, _**Sparta**_ and _**Athens**_ were a force to be reckoned with._"

While the game is still on pause, I hurry to ponder why the bubbles about city-states appear over separate people…could this game be about personified places rather than wars fought in those places? Interesting way to portray history...

If so, then Sparta has a bad navy—if I can get into the water, maybe he won't try to kill me!

The game plays again, and I jump out of the way at the last moment. The fact that I couldn't choose which direction to jump may have saved me—I was about to jump right, when I turned left, and he stabbed the air where I should've been.

Bolting toward the coast, I pant, running over and around the debris. I bend my knees to jump into the water, when pain explodes from behind my back and through my stomach. I scream, but it is only a gurgle, and blood splatters into the water. I am leaning over the water, prepared to jump, with a fifteen-foot-long spear going through my stomach.

Gurgling comes out of my throat, hot, sticky blood dribbling over my lips. I've lost feeling in my legs, and they become wobbly and shaky, like Jell-O.

Sparta grabs onto my pack, both my pack and his spear holding me above the water. My heartbeat has become faster, and by blood leaves through my wound and my mouth very quickly. Sparta yanks my pack off of my back, breaking the straps. My torso slumps forward, twisting my insides around the spear painfully. I gasp out blood, and he yanks the spear from my body, sending me into the water.

A black screen appears around me, bold white, blinding words printed high above my head, saying** DEAD; RESTART AT LAST CHECKPOINT.**

Pain now instantly gone, I am beamed back to where I stood, staring at Athens. I grasp my stomach, where the spear went through, my heart pounding, marvelling at the fact that it hurt so much! Taking no more than a second to check myself, I race toward Athens, dropping to my knees by his side, shaking him gently, saying, "Athens, Athens! Buddy, wake up! Sparta's gonna kill me!"

Murmuring groans come from the man's mouth, and I gasp in relief, feeling my shoulders slump. I bolt to the coast and find a bucket. I lower it down and scoop up water. I bring it back to Athens and say, "ATHENS!" I dump half of the water over him. He jerks awake, sitting up instantly, and says in a soft-toned, yet stunned voice, "Persia got me?"

I nod, saying, "Yes! I just saved you, got it? Now, when Sparta comes, don't let him kill me!"

At this moment, Sparta appears, shouting, "Persian!"

"FRIEND!" I scream, dropping to my knees and throwing my hands in the air, still holding the half-full bucket. Athens gently pulls me to my feet, yet he is shaken and weak, so I let him support himself on me. He takes the bucket from me, saying "Excuse me" like a gentleman and takes a drink. He tells Sparta, "Sparta! She is a friend! She just revived me!"

Sparta scoffs, saying, "She is a Persian who is pretendined to be one of our allies!"

Athens turns to me, asking softly, "Who are you?"

Gulping, I say, "I am one of Athena's servants, Erva. I have come to assist in the fight against Persia."

The city-state's eyes widen, and he asks breathlessly, "Really? Why is Athena not here, with you?"

_Convincing...be convincing..._ "Athena is struggling to get Zeus's approval for assistance in the war...because I am not a god or goddess, then those rules don't apply, so she sent me."

Straightening up, Sparta asks, "Well, what about Ares?"

Respectfully turning to him and bowing my head, I say, "Ares wishes to join the battle for Greece's side, yet Hera has demanded that the gods and goddesses do not meddle down here...Zeus is bound by that because he doesn't want Hera to be upset. Ares has tried many times to come down and help, but Artemis and Apollo, on Hera's side, have intercepted him every time."

Looking at each other, the city-states seem to ponder my honesty. I wonder if they can communicate telepathically or read minds. I force all thoughts out of my head, and finally, Sparta says, "Fine. How may you help with the war?"

I really don't think I stand a chance against Persians, but I am in a _game_, after all. I say, "I can be a spy, and I can handle hand-to-hand combat as well as fighting with swords."

Sparta nods, and Athens says, "Very good!"

Time jumps, and I am now standing in a phalanx formation. I am stunned. WHERE AM I?! I see the Persian army up ahead, and I realize that I am wearing a Greek uniform, holding a spear in my right arm and a shield in my left. I wear a helmet, a green plume on it. To my left, Athens stands. To my right, Sparta stands. The Persians attack, and Sparta shouts, "SHIELDS!"

As if I know how to do this, I duck my head and throw my shield in front of me in the same swift motion as the other Greeks. Persians attack the shields, and loud dinging and clanking fills my ears, deafening me. I thrust my spear between my shield and Sparta's shield, stabbing a Persian in the neck. He falls back, dead.

THIS. GAME. IS. AWESOME!

I begin stabbing and thrusting. I use my shield as a weapon, hitting Persians in the neck so hard that I break their windpipes. The Persian numbers low, Sparta shouts, "FREE FOR ALL!" and my blood runs cold. How can I handle a "free for all"? When I leave the phalanx, I'll probably be shredded!

The Greeks break away from me, city-states included, so I am forced to jump out into the battle. I deflect an attack with my shield then spear the Persian, panting, heart racing. I yank the spear from his body, splattering his blood over the shield and myself. Another Persian charges at me, but I deflect him with my spear then kick him in the stomach, sending him flying back onto his butt. I spear him in the chest with the spear, but I stabbed him in the lung, not the heart. He coughs and hacks up blood, and I stomp on his stomach, making him scream in pain.

Bloodlust blinds me. As I am fighting, Athens and Sparta are going two-on-one against Persia. Persia backs up and up, up a hill, swinging his sword and shield, deflecting every blow. At this rate, no one will die!

It begins to rain, but the fighting doesn't cease. I see an Athenian foot-soldier about to be killed by four Persians, but I spear three of them through the sides with my spear, doing so in a single thrust, and allow the Athenian to slash the last one's jugular.

He thanks me, and I say gruffly, "Stay close to the others if you can't handle combat alone!"

Taking at as an order, he rushes away toward a group of Spartan foot-soldiers. The ground turns into thick mud, stained red by blood of fallen Greeks and Persians alike. I've always wondered how so many people die in war, how can there be survivors? It's like, if you can die, then why do you live? How does it just happen to be you? I think this subconsciously as I kill several more Persians.

Lightning streaks across the sky, Persia, Athens, and Sparta at the top of their hill. They are sillhouetted by the sliver of gold for a single moment, then a loud boom crashes through the air, so loud that it seems to have made the earth shake.

"ZEUS!" a Greek shouts. I am about to gut a Persian when lightning snakes through the air again, but it lands right between the Persian and I. An explosion sends the dirt and myself flying back. Ringing fills my ears, blood streaming from my ears and nose. There is a gash on my forehead, and black stains my shield. These shields can't attract lightning! Is it possible that Zeus, a Greek god, is really here? This _is_, after all, a game!

Deafened and lame, I lay on my back, staring blankly into space. I see a Persian appear, looming above me menacingly. The Persian picks up a Greek spear, but I am unable to move as he aims it at my chest or neck; I can't tell.

A sword slices through his chest from behind, and he falls down, dead. The Greek that I saved earlier stands there, yanking his sword out of the Persian's back. He smiles at me from behind his helmet, saying, "If you can't handle fighting alone, then get back to the others!"

He grabs onto my hand and pulls me to my feet. He yelled so loud that I could barely hear his voice hum, but that hum has now turned into almost-normal hearing as I hear him say, "Either Zeus was saving you, or he tried to kill you! Come on!"

Up on the hill, Persia is now unarmed. Sparta thrusts his spear through Persia's stomach at the same moment that Athens slices his spear at the back of Persia's head. Lightning strikes the sky again, and everything turns black. I stand in an abyss, white letters above me, saying **THE GREEKS WON THE WAR TEN YEARS EARLIER. NICELY DONE.**

The blackness fades away, and I am standing in the field again, backpack on my back. That was amazing! It was so realistic and amazing! I take my pack off, looking at it, and a sticker materializes on it. A picture of a helmet with a horse-mane plume.

WOW! I put my pack on and walk in the opposite direction as last time. I assume that I just walk to enter different levels. I start singing "Wasteland" by 10 Years, cuz that song is freaking epic.

I stumble upon a black screen that says "BONUS LEVELS". That sounds awesome! I step up to it, and the screen changes, showing a bookshelf of pictures and titles. One that I like shows a half-eaten moldy green tomato with the title "_THE WALKING TOMATOES_."

Smiling, I tap that. The screen becomes large, and a caption says, "**THE WALKING TOMATOES**; _Italy, Romano, and Spain are trapped in the zombie apocolypse! Can you get them out alive_?"

Tapping the screen again, I am wooshed away into an empty street. It is dark and gloomy, and a sick smell of death fills the air. I hear, "GRRRRRRRRR" behind me, and I wheel around to see six zombies approaching.

Gasping, I spin around and begin to run away. ZOMBIES! I hate zombie apocolypse things, okay? It's fun to play zombie games, but this game is so realistic that I'm REALLY afraid!

I see a garbage can, and I climb onto it, then onto a dumpster next to it, then onto a high chain-link fence. On the other end, there are ten zombies, all of them groaning and grabbing for the fence. The fence shakes under their decomposing hands, and I squeak, grabbing onto the fence in both hands, afraid of falling. The six zombies come up from the other side, and I am trapped on top of a fence with zombies shaking it.

Ho. Ly. Crap.


End file.
